Energy, Values, and Mentorship with David Meltzer | Ep 23

David Meltzer: 00:00:00

Forgiveness actually changes all meaning in your life. It is the healing source of ease. And so I started to practice forgiveness and not forgiving other people because I can't give what I don't have.

I started by forgiving myself because like you said, God knows what else.

Arjun: 00:00:24

Welcome back to the show, guys.

I'm really excited about this upcoming episode to share with you because I had opportunity to, not that long ago, sit down in the studios of the David Meltzer. So we filmed this episode right there in his spot in Las Vegas.

And it was an incredibly revealing and honest conversation about people that he looks up to and still calls upon as his mentors.

The very unique and loving relationship that he has with his mother, and the ability to bounce back after losing so much wealth and money over his career. Now David is known to so many people as an incredible entrepreneur, thought, thought leader, author, keynote speaker.

To me, he's of course, all of those things.

Arjun: 00:01:03

But as I've gotten to know him.

Arjun: 00:01:04

Over recent years, the thing that I can refer to David as is just an incredibly down to earth human being.

He's always willing to help people, collaborate with them, and understands that the true power of the human spirit is to help lift other people up to pour into others. He lives and breathes by this mantra and it's why I respect him so much. And also I enjoyed this conversation with him.

So enjoy the show and, and let's get to it.

David Meltzer: 00:01:36

My first thing is what practices can I put into place in order to facilitate how physics works within the consciousness? And that's an energetic and a genetic consciousness that we have. And so the first thing was just values.

It's what I teach Monday, Wednesday and Fridays to every employee I have, which results in one of the greatest compliments in my life, which is, wow, you have an amazing team and you have an amazing family. And the reason I have an amazing team and I have an amazing family is I am value based in what I do.

And there's four simple values in which I started. The foundational practices in my life is I started to practice gratitude.

And the greatest lesson I learned about practicing gratitude is that human beings hate consistent behavior and they cannot commit to doing something every day, even if it's free, even if it takes 0.1 seconds, and even if it's guaranteed by the smartest people in history to change your life to the positive, we still can't do it.

And I'm talking about just saying thank you, which I learned that I tried my best for nine months to say thank you before I went to sleep and when I went to bed to change my life. And it took me nine months before I could make it to 30 days. And so gratitude became a cornerstone which led to forgiveness.

And I think people don't practice forgiveness. I put out a thread today about forgiveness is that forgiveness actually changes all meaning in your life. It is the healing source of ease.

And so I started to practice forgiveness and not forgiving other people because I can't give what I don't have. I started by forgiving myself because like you said, God knows what else David Meltzer, you had to forgive yourself about. And I did. And I do still.

And I teach it and I preach it and I empower it. Third is accountability, which is the lesson learning trait of control. You see, most people think counterintuitive.

They think that if I blame other people, if I live in shame or I can figure out a justification for why I am where I don't want to be, then I have control. But it's not true. You see, when we ask ourselves what did I do to be responsible?

What did I do to attract this and most importantly, what am I doing today to participate in the perception and what am I supposed to learn from it? I immediately take control the minute I say what am I supposed to learn from it?

I now take control of my own life and then finally that leads to inspiration. So these and through effective communication with my faith, to others and through me, now I have a foundation.

Now I can have the daily practices that are foundationally value based. Know my what, know my who, know my how, prioritize my now and apply my why. Now I can create an execution model on top of that.

Arjun: 00:04:35

I love it.

And this movie is what you developed in a lot of those past more well known falls or missteps in your life where you had to put things back together again and come forward. So we fast forward.

Is there anything in recent months or recent years where you've had to apply this same process again that might surprise some people or maybe you haven't talked about recently?

David Meltzer: 00:05:00

Great question. I'm going to talk about something that scares the shit out of me. Is and is something I'm dealing with today.

Dane Cook and I were putting on the collab which is at YouTube Theater now I've in humility learned that and you're someone who's hired me to speak with Ryan Serhant and Gary Vaynerchuk and some of the biggest names in the world. I've learned one thing about me and speaking is that I'm not to the point where I can fill up Madison Square Garden and sell tickets.

If you put on every billboard in America, David Melter is going to be at Madison Square Garden for thought leadership and the most inspirational speech you've ever heard since Tony Robbins. I doubt it would sell out. I would argue with that. But I'm not a ticket seller yet in that capacity and I think a lot of people don't understand.

It's okay just to be impactful and build that audience so that you can sell tickets. I could sell a thousand tickets. I absolutely can sell out 100 person dinner no matter what the price is.

And so I agreed with Dane, who has sold out Madison Square Garden, by the way, and does sell tickets to come up with a new way of doing things. And so we wanted to collaborate with the audience. Rob Riggle steps up. Who's gonna emcee it?

Baron Davis and Marshall Falk and Diane Cannon and I mean, during the middle of the summer. And we're going to do it at YouTube Theater. And I am fighting my ego because I want it to sell out so bad. Even though I know I don't sell tickets.

Even though I know Dane does sell tickets. And I'm stuck in this quandary of being grateful that holy shit, I'm putting on a huge Live Nation's promoting it.

Ticketmaster selling the tickets, it's massive. It's massive. But my ego. And so here's the lesson that I'm fighting today. And I love this. I have realized that I'm either humble or I'm about to be.

And I know that I'm about to be humble again because I'm fighting every day. People like you, I appreciate. Oh, I doubt you. Oh, you could sell out Madison Square Garden if you had that.

But the truth is I want to remain in humility, which means being a ferocious. And you'll get this as a world champion that you are athlete. I'm a ferocious Buddha.

What I loved about golf and pole vaulting was as a smaller individual, which you can identify with as an athlete that's smaller, that there's always this subjectivity, that you're the third string, like the Austin Eckler. Right. Sixth string. And you always have to prove well, when you play golf and you shoot a 65, there's just objective. You won, right?

Arjun: 00:07:47

Absolutely.

David Meltzer: 00:07:47

You pull Vault, you clear 20ft.

Arjun: 00:07:49

It's pretty zero sum.

David Meltzer: 00:07:50

Yeah, right. And I love that. And I'm fighting that all the time.

The subjectivity in an arena now that gives you the benefit of the Doubt like I never had in sports. I have it in speaking. I have it in coaching. I have it in what I do. This podcast. Right. It's the brand carries it.

But I want to be humble and be ferocious, as if I was not being recognized for my skill to push me. So to me, that's the biggest step of being uncomfortable. Like, there's no reason that I should do the collab with Dane Cook in my mind, right.

Live this beautiful life. And it's like, why would you jeopardize your reputation when it's going to be half empty? There's only 2,000 people. But you know what?

You're either humble or you're about to be.

Arjun: 00:08:39

Right.

David Meltzer: 00:08:39

Well.

Arjun: 00:08:39

And that's where the growth comes. Right?

David Meltzer: 00:08:41

Right.

Arjun: 00:08:41

You're putting yourself out there a bit. But this humility that you talk about, which I think ties a lot to your service to others.

And there's this great quote, but every time I hear it and it comes up a lot, I think of you, which is that if you are not in service to others, you will be very lonely in business and in life. And that's your entire mantra.

David Meltzer: 00:09:01

Yeah.

Arjun: 00:09:01

I don't know who wrote it or where I read it. It might have even been.

David Meltzer: 00:09:04

You know, I love that.

Arjun: 00:09:05

Wherever I got it, it's like it just sticks. I know that's your mindset. I know that's your approach. It's what you live by. What is now fueling you.

What are you putting that behind right now in these years of your life? Because you've got this beautiful family. You have created success.

More importantly, you've created success for so many other people that are part of your tribe, which is why I really gravitate towards you. Not because I'm hoping for that level of success. It's because I really admire it. But what is fueling you now?

What does the future look like for David?

David Meltzer: 00:09:34

Community. This idea of how big the total addressable community is. You and I are old enough to know that it wasn't always available to us.

Arjun: 00:09:44

No.

David Meltzer: 00:09:44

When you're putting on your incredible events or the forward event which your brother and you put on here in Las Vegas, it's just him. Yeah.

Arjun: 00:09:51

Hell, credit for.

David Meltzer: 00:09:52

But you're a good helper. But it's the community that it's so big and the impact that I have a framework that works.

How to teach people to make money, help people and have fun, how to live in abundance. I know how to empower someone like you. To empower another thousand. To empower a thousand.

So now, in my mission, it inspires me that I know a thousand Arjuns. I do. I know them.

And they're giving me time like you are to say, hey, let me give you a few little dummy tax tips so that you can empower other people. A thousand. I know you're good, but let me just give you a few tips to empower a thousand when you do your events.

And then they can empower a thousand because we can change the world together. We can change this idea of separation into appreciation and the form of agreement into appreciation. We don't have to agree, bro.

You and I, we probably don't agree on the same foods, we don't agree on the same movies, we don't agree on the same politics or religion. But if we appreciate the difference is then that is that unified, abundant system that I want to teach people to be on.

And what fires me up about value and service is something that's different for me and so many others is I recognize now that allowing other people to be of service to me or to my community is providing value. Because what I've learned is I'm being selfish by always having having to do for other people because I get to feel good.

There's nothing that makes me feel better than I'm capable of helping someone, especially someone relative to me. Why am I cheating other people when they say, hey, Dave, I'd like to do this for you? And I used to say, no.

Instead, now I say, yeah, that'd be really awesome because I realized I'm cheating that person of value big time. And that's the biggest two differences in that really inspires me today.

Arjun: 00:11:52

And a big angle of being in service to others is mentorship. And I can never get my head around when I hear about people that say, I never had a mentor, I never needed a mentor.

You know, we were having a conversation outside about this, and I think there's a total element of ego that's involved in such a statement.

But who were and maybe still are today, like people that you admire even for some of the frameworks we talked about earlier with how to get through difficult things, how to bounce back, how to be resilient.

Are there resilient people that maybe are outside of your immediate family that you still look to and say, this person because of what they've done, are these people?

David Meltzer: 00:12:25

Well, I have mentors that are from afar and not alive. Einstein's one of them. I've had mentors that were in my life and have passed, like Bob Proctor and Dr. Wayne Dyer. I Have mentors today.

And here's an interesting one. There's a dangerous statement. There's a couple dangerous one. The more you give, the more you receive.

I always say, the more you give, the more you're given. Elevate your awareness to what you're given, feel worthy of receiving it, and ask for more.

But the other dangerous one is you're the aggregate of the five people that you spend the most time with. That's a dangerous statement because it's way too narrow. See, I'm thinking of things in a different realm as teams.

So I actually say subject matter, topic or expertise. You want to form a team and you want to determine what position you want to play on that team.

And so if I was on a basketball team, I'd be the water boy. And there's some teams that I want to be on that I want to be the coach or the owner or the point guard or the center or the sixth man.

And now I'm talking within the realm.

Yes, you aggregate the energy of the people you surround yourself with, but you have a role to play in a position to play by subject matter, topic, or expertise. This is why mentorship's so important. You know what my number one mentor is that I've had the longest? Sleep. I have a sleep coach.

Tell me how, in prioritizing life, a third of my life is spent sleeping. It's scientifically proven that sleep has more to do with your success than anything else. And your health. Not just your success, your health. Right.

And yet how many people do you know, besides me that have had a sleep coach, a sleep mentor, for 17 years?

Arjun: 00:14:09

I don't know anyone.

David Meltzer: 00:14:10

Most people don't even hear of them.

Arjun: 00:14:11

I need a referral, so I'll talk to you about it, please.

David Meltzer: 00:14:14

And so I have a sleep team, and I know my role on the sleep team. And I need a mentor.

Someone who sits in a situation that I want to be in and has knowledge that I want for me in order to give me the steps to take to get there or better. Right? Tiger woods coach. He got to where his coach is and better. He's the best golfer in the world. He still has a coach, he has a mentor.

So for me, I have a business mentor, I have a sleep mentor, I have a family mentor, which is actually my mom. And so I wasn't good at marriage the first seven years. I wasn't good at it, and I wasn't good at being a parent.

And so I have a parent mentor, I have a marriage mentor. Because these are really important things to me. I have a financial mentor, I have a business mentor. And they're all the best investment.

They're all profit centers for me.

And when someone said to me, Bob Proctor said this to me, he said, dave, because he had really fancy cars at the time, he's like, how much is that Ferrari? I let him know. And he goes, so every year you have to pay so much to maintain that Ferrari as well.

I'm like, yeah, I pay this insurance and, you know, if you drive it enough, it breaks down. If you drive it too much, it breaks down. And if someone scratches it, it's eight grand or a windshield. Right? He's like, he said, and how much?

I was in my 30s, Dave, how much are you paying for your health? Huh? Well, I, you know, I belong to the gym. It's 19.99amonth. Is LA Fitness. Yeah, right?

Arjun: 00:15:49

24 hours.

David Meltzer: 00:15:50

Yeah. What else? I'm like, so you pay $19.99 a month on your health and you're paying thousands of dollars a month for that Ferrari? Did I got that right?

Yeah. Do you see anything wrong with that? He goes, son, you got to prioritize your life differently.

You need non negotiables that actually mean something to you, where you want to be or better. And he changed. And I got a team for my health. And this is what I encourage people to do.

Find someone that sits in the situation according to subject matter, topic or expertise, and pick what position you want to play when you determine what mentor you need.

Arjun: 00:16:45

You mentioned Einstein, and that might make some people scratch their heads and wonder, huh? Like from so far, you said from the grave or from. From afar. Tell me a little more about that. How does that actually inspire you?

Because there's so many figures that have long come that we never had human contact with, so we weren't affected in that way, but we've learned from them or read about them in histories. But you call that an actual mentor?

David Meltzer: 00:17:07

Yeah. There's several areas that most people may or may not know. Number one, physics. He's one of the greatest geniuses in the world in physics.

And physics obviously plays an integral part in the universe. So I went to the best to give me directions to understand physics, but also gratitude.

If you look at Einstein, he's a great mentor in gratitude, and then also in human nature.

And so as I studied more and more about Einstein and the relativity of the world and understanding in fact, the criteria of what I surround myself, one, how much is it feeding or bleeding me, which is energy. Two, how relative is it to me? And three, what association or perception do I give it?

This is all Einstein's mentorship for me and understanding those three things as a criteria in order to effectuate surrounding myself with the right people and the right ideas aligned with subject matter, topic or expertise. And the more you study Einstein, you could see the applicability of what he understood. You see, he's not a great mathematician.

He was a theoretical mathematician. He worked in theories, he would have like super scientists and math people prove his theories. But he had this vision and his ability to see things.

The mindset, heart set, enhance set in a reconciliation and understanding the three characteristics of energy aggregation, acceleration and compounding of exponential results. You know, the rule of 72 is Einstein's.

That's probably one of the most financially solid philosophies in business is the rule of 72 and compounding interest, that's Einstein. And so understanding these mentors and for me, the spirituality, the course in miracles is another one. The Old Testament, the new.

I am a faith based person, but I have probably a more non traditional, less dogmatic perspective. I also have a simple, as you know, faith. And I have to tell everyone because look, people ask me, what do you believe in?

I'm like, look, it's really simple to me. It's best option faith. And I think it's applicable to almost every religion, philosophy, theory and spirituality. I believe very simple.

There's something bigger than me that knows everything and it has all the power in the world and it loves me more than my mom. That's it. And so people say, so you believe in Jesus, Dave? I was like, bigger than you, omniscient and all powerful. Loves you more than your mom?

Yeah, oh yeah, I'm a Jesus lover. You name it. If that's the criteria, I'm in.

Arjun: 00:19:47

Dave, the last thing I want to ask you is what does LFG energy mean to you? I ask every guest this and it's a different but beautiful answer every time. What does LFG energy mean to you?

David Meltzer: 00:19:58

To me it's being a ferocious Buddha and understanding the infinite nature of energy. I look at LFG energy as what am I doing to interfere with the enormous amount, the infinite energy, the abundant, infinite, unified system of energy.

What am I doing to interfere with it?

So when we say lfg, I'm actually saying, hey, what is my reaction to fear and how can I dissipate, dissolve, spend minutes and moments interfering with lfg? LFG energy is infinite energy. And it means minimize the amount of time you spend interfering with lfg, not going to get LFG or forcing it upon you.

It's actually quit interfering with it. Get out of your own way. Allow it to come through you for others, to others in a world of more than enough of everything for everyone.

Arjun: 00:20:49

Beautiful.

It's a great answer and I appreciate it because you've been part of this for me and my journey with the inception of this community, this podcast, even from its day one. I appreciate it. I thank you so much. I value as a mentor and a big brother. And love you, Dave. So thank you.

David Meltzer: 00:21:05

Love you. Please have me back. We'll do this again. And keep bringing all your terrific neighborhood friends with you.

Arjun: 00:21:11

Absolutely. Thank you, brother.

David Meltzer: 00:21:12

You got it. Thank you.